They say there are 3 certainties in life death, taxes and the Barmy Army winning rugby matches. Well this old saying turned out to be true as the second team headed to a picturesque Osset rugby club to continue their unbeaten run. With Marcus Little away on holiday, his son Jake stepped in with the help of injured James Ward to manage the army, Tom Orange was also in the crowd. A man who is beginning to run out of excuses as to why he never plays.

With Emely Moor looming in the background the 2nd team brought a strong squad with the experience of Sean Lally and Bryn Kitching and the youth of Mackenzie Scurr and Matty Jones. The 2nd team started strong with debutant Elliot Jobes making some thumping tackles (not bad for a man who hasn’t played in 5 years), Jobes soon broke the line and earned Wetherby a penalty.

With Shaw ready to kick for touch he quickly switched the play and launched a crossfield kick to Scurr, now Adam Shaw would tell you this ball glided perfectly into the hands of a galloping Scurr who passed to Harry Stobert for the 1st try, others may say the ball took a lucky bounce and Mackenzie Scurr happens to be quite good a rugby. We will leave this one to the imagination.

Wetherby continued their 1st half dominance with a line break from Liam Harrison passing it onto Tom Thackeray who opted to score a try rather than launch the ball into Wakefield prison. The Osset team found Mackenzie Scurr rather hard to tackle all game, but they were saved by Scurr falling over himself on multiple occasions, however he made up for this with a 50m ‘transition’ try dancing round 4 players to take Wetherby to a mammoth lead. The 1st half was topped off by the backs passing it through hands giving Hills an easy try to take Wetherby into the 1st half on top.

The team talk at half time was buoyant but there was a man missing as our assistant social sec had decided to take himself off to the toilet. Changes were made as Hardman and Kitching made their way onto the field.

The 2nd half started with Osset forward dominance again using the snowball tactic that Wertherby have struggled with in the past, Ossett managed to create 2 tries out of this to take the score to 30-10.

However Wetherby were too quick for the home side with Will Jefferson, who’s Mum was once again in attendance and Harry Stobert, who loves a post-match beer, scoring dazzling tries. I now present to all readers the game within the game. You would think smiles would be all round with Wetherby 30 points up but no, some of the players decided to play the game of ‘who can get the angriest when we are 30 points up:

• Player 1 – Harry Stobert. Now Stobert had not played all year but decided to start a fight with an opposing winger for what was a cheap shot. But when Wetherby got called for a ‘questionable’ forward pass Stobert saw red and decided to rage at his own teammates on the pitch.
• Player 2 – Sean Whitelow. A veteran of this game who loves to get angry when the team are winning. Again opted for the mental breakdown tactic in the middle of the pitch and provided a pretty good lecture on how the backs can hold more depth.
• Player 3 – Tom Kitching. It was Kitching who stole the show, known around the club as ‘the nice guy’ Kicthing showed he had a venomous side to him when he told his teammates ‘I have not turned up on a Saturday to miss tackles and play as **** as we are doing’.

Anyway soon Lally and Matthew Jones calmed the situation down and Wetherby continued to unleash fire onto Osset. Tom Kitching broke free showing real pace and anger giving the army anther try and Will Jefferson scored his 2nd try with a nice chip and chase.

Now it wouldn’t be a 2nd team match report without mentioning myself, would it? Well Olly Hills made a line break in the dying moments of the game, with Scurr by his side there were 2 men closing in on the winger. The connection between Hills and Scurr is so strong that Hills gave a no look pass to Scurr who touched down for the final try, showing Scurr how to assist your teammates.

Man of the match was awarded to Adam Shaw, who is mounting a colossal lead in ‘top of the props’, although Lally did slot a conversion and has a try to his name this season.

Dick of the day went to Matty Jones, for his toilet break at half time.

The 2nd team play Roundhegians next week looking to make it 2 months undefeated.